My talk for church July 15, 2012

 (For my talk/ sermon in church, I used people's first names, but here I have tried to remove their names to better focus on the experiences they had.)
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When I first received the topic, "Relief Society, And The Role of Women In Service," I asked some of my friends if they had any personal experiences that they'd be willing to share with me.  The stories I share are their stories, their experiences. 

Anne Frank once said, "How wonderful it is that nobody need wait a single moment before starting to improve the world."

In his talk entitled "The Enduring Legacy of Relief Society"  President Eyring in October 2009, reminded us all that the history of Relief Society is recorded in works and numbers, but the *heritage* is passed [from] heart to heart. He goes on to say,.....

 "Under the leadership of women of great vision and capacity, the Relief Society took the lead in starting charitable services which did not exist on the frontier in those times for those in need. They began programs which became over the years the worldwide LDS Family Services programs. They  created a grain storage system so effective that they could respond to a request for help from the federal government, in a time of war and crisis. They began what became the Primary and what became the organization for young women in the Church. They created their own magazine for women. The Relief Society was at the heart of the beginning of the Church’s power to give humanitarian aid across the world. Relief Society has become one of the largest organizations for women in the world. "

 All this is a result of women seeing a need, and creating a solution.  Being able to serve others isn't dependent upon having a large group of women, rather it is dependent on each one of us having a willing heart-- one filled with charity, with love, and with compassion. Martin Luther King, Jr. once said, "Everybody can be great... because anybody can serve. You don't have to have a college degree to serve. You don't have to make your subject and verb agree to serve. You only need a heart full of grace.  A soul generated by love."  

Service, is in essence, one of the best ways we can show our love for our fellow beings.  It is an opportunity to look outside ourselves, widen our horizons, and improve bonds of friendship. 

 I'd love to share with you the story of a young mother, who with her family moved into their new home in northern Utah. At the time of this story, she was a mother of three, and about to have her fourth. Here is her story in her words.

 "When [our youngest] was born, neither my mother nor my mother-in-law could come help me...I hadn't planned on not having their help, emergencies on both sides just ...came up at the same time as [his] delivery. So, there we were, new baby, three small children, brand new in the neighborhood, and no family coming to [the rescue]. We were ready to just live in "survival mode". Then, [to our surprise], neighbors started showing up ([And they] must have been prompted to come because I didn't call [them]). Many brought dinners large enough for leftovers, one brought a beautiful quilt, a few brought clothes, another--a wonderful older man (who I later found out was the stake patriarch), showed up with a handmade bookcase and said, "I make these whenever I get a new grandbaby, [and your son,] can be a surrogate." And then he and his wife stayed to chat a bit, which made my day so great. I vowed then and there that I will never *not* serve just because I don't know someone. Often, when calls are put out to help someone that I don't know, [I've thought], "Well, I can drop something off, but they don't really know me, so I won't stay." But that month (yeah, [we got] a whole month of service!) I learned that I WANTED people I didn't know to stay. I wanted conversation and fellowship, and I hope to give it [to others] in the future. Those people are now [friends, and ] I love to take all of my children to visit, [them]. I wouldn't have traded that struggle for the world, because it brought those people into my life."

 Despite the overwhelming difficulty of her situation, I love how she expresses her appreciation for those who served her, and her determination to provide that same amount of love and care to others in the future.  And because of the service of those in her new ward [and neighborhood], she is not surrounded by those who are her new neighbors, but  she and her family are surrounded by friends.  This is one of the things service can do-- it can turn perfect strangers into friends.

Jo Ann Abegglen, while speaking at a BYU devotional said, "To be like the Savior is to be whole, which implies that we are engaged in acts of selfless service. Selfless service requires personal action... It is easy to give away excess money, used equipment, and used clothing. It is more difficult to give of our time, to give of our personal presence to help others."

 One of my friends in California,  was the recipient of such *personal* service many years ago, when she had to go on bed rest.  Here is her story:    “ When I was pregnant with [my son], I spent 20 weeks on bed rest, and he [still] ended up coming 10 weeks early, weighing 2 lbs. 15 oz.  [I spent the last six weeks of my pregnancy] at the hospital,  [and My husband's] mom and my mom took turns staying at our house. The [Relief Society] sisters were so good to our family. Sisters regularly came, and cleaned the house, and took the [older] kids out to play with their children. They visited me in the hospital, called me just to talk... and even decorated my hospital room for me! All the time, they made me feel like I was doing them a favor! They recorded [the relief society] lessons so I could feel like I was part of RS. Probably most importantly, they prayed for us. One sister told me that when she called the temple to put our family's name on the prayer roll, the temple worker asked her what was wrong with our family--because the temple had received [so] many requests to put our family's name on the [temple prayer] rolls. I'll never forget the feeling I had when she told me that. It was then that I realized just how many people had prayed [our son] safely to earth. [Years later,] I still get teary-eyed thinking about it."

 On lds.org this wonderful quote is posted: "One true key to happiness is to labor for the happiness of others."

 In our hectic lives as women, where we seem to either be running after little ones, driving to and from different activities, or striving to help our children in one way or another as they become adults,  and we may think we cannot serve.  We may think we have enough on our agenda, and that, for now, service is just not something we have the time for.  If that is the case, then we have forgotten that service within the home is paramount-- and that by caring for little ones, or older ones, making meals, or indeed any number of things that come with being a parent-- by doing those things, we ARE serving.  Not only are we serving, but we are teaching the value of acts of kindness within the home-- something that will stay with them as they grow, and have children of their own.  Bedtime stories, hugs, sharing in giggles and jokes, even doing the dishes when it may be another's turn, speaks VOLUMES!-- *everything* that we do within the home can be an act of service if it is done with love.

Belle Spafford, a Relief Society General President once said, "A woman's reach is bounded only by what her mind accepts and her heart allows.”

One of my favorite ways to serve is by doing secret service.  Not only do I enjoy the perks of being righteously sneaky, but I've seen that the repercussions of secret service are huge.  As the one who is receiving the service does not know who gives it,  it means that *anyone* could be the one who has been thinking of them..... and that leads to believing that *everyone* could be a candidate.  When the world is viewed through such a cheerfully colored lens, the receiver often wants to share that joy and happiness, and in time, pays it forward to someone else-- and thus we change the world for the better, one selfless act at a time. 

Perhaps one of the reasons we are able to serve so well, is because we ourselves have been through many of those types of situations. We willingly stand at the thresholds of transition for others, and help them to cross those difficult bridges by lifting, cheering, or sometimes even carrying them as we serve.  As the the poem ’Footprints in the Sand' tells us , we are never alone in our struggles, the Savior is always with us-- and in return, we can stand ready to help others along as well.

 There are as many ways to serve one another: dinners, exchanging emails or letters to share in both struggles and advice, giving hugs and  'hello's when your paths cross, showing up to do their dishes, or just being there to listen, are just the beginning.

 On Facebook last month, a mother shared this blogged story:

 "We were 10 minutes late to church and the only pew big enough to fit our family of three restless toddlers was near the front. With the help of goldfish crackers, sippy cups full of water, crayons and trucks, we made it through the hour long service. As I made my way out of the pew, ... a woman came up to me and asked me how I was feeling.  "Oh, good."  I replied with a kind of smile I've put on lately--sincere, but weary.

The woman says, "So, I'll be by tomorrow to pick up your laundry."  She says this as if we had already talked about it. "Wait, what?  My laundry?  Why?" 

"Because I want to help you.  I'm too old to get down on the floor and play with the kids, but I can [help with the] laundry."  She was so sure that this was happening.  So sincere in her offering.  So full of love. 

'Thanks," I stammer, holding back tears.  "That would be really great.  Thank you." 

She smiles, tells me she'll be by around 9:30.  And she was.  She returned later that day with a box full of clean, folded and pressed… I wrapped my arms around her wise shoulders, gave her a hug and told her how much I appreciated her help.

 "Well," she said, "the Lord has blessed me with a lot in my life, so there is a lot I can do."

The older woman in this story shows that she is living the words of the song, ‘Because I have been given much, I too must give.’ What a blessing she was to the young mother J

One of my friends shared this thought with me, "I think the biggest thing about service, absolute service, is [it] shows in your heart."  And it does! Not only for those who are on the receiving end, but for those doing the service, it leaves a mark-- a heavenly glow.   Another friend summed it up when she shared this,  "That's the thing about service; when we serve with the right attitude we ALWAYS end up getting more blessings than we give. We will always be in debt to God, but our good works make our faith stronger, so we can see with [an] eternal perspective instead of  [a] worldly [one]. 

As RS women, we pack boxes when families move, bring meals to the sick, babysit so that parents can find peace in the temple, we bring cookies or brownies to those new to the neighborhood. We can cheer and encourage, share in one another's celebrations, and have the box of tissue, and hugs, ready for when sorrow or afflictions are present.

Washington Irving once said: "There is in every true woman's heart, a spark of heavenly fire, which lies dormant in the broad daylight of prosperity, but which kindles up and beams and blazes in the dark hour of adversity." 

We can hold that 'heavenly fire' within us from the first breath we take here on earth-- age doesn't matter. I personally, feel very blessed to watch our daughter grow.  I’ve watched her willingness to help others, and her courage in adversity. Her own strength has -- and always will be—an inspiration to me to do better at kindling my own ‘heavenly flame’.

 One of the mothers of a friend of mine, shared this story with me: She says, "I remember when [my husband],  was really sick and was in a coma, how much the Relief Society did for me. One sister bought us a Christmas tree. Several sisters [took turns babysitting my youngest] for me so I could go to see [him] at the hospital. The best thing I remember was coming home to some wonderful chicken soup made by [one of the sisters]. I had some, and didn't realize until I took a bite, how hungry I really was."

Sometimes we may need to jump in and be ready to help, and not wait for an engraved invitation. Those around us, may not realize themselves how much they stand in need of an act of kindness.

We have many spheres of influence, whether we are young, single adults, newly married, mothers, or grandmothers. We have that influence whether we are 9 years old, or 98. As Jo Ann Abegglan puts it, "We are never too young or too old to engage in selfless service."

 As women, as members of a world, wide Relief Society, our power to do good in this world is far reaching. Not only can we serve in groups, singly, in and or with family members, but we can-- by our actions-- teach others the benefits, and blessings of service. When we serve, we teach our children, friends, and neighbors how important it is. When we give of our time for others, we show them how highly we value and appreciate them. To give of ourselves through service, is to do the Lord's work. We act as His hands, His Voice of comfort, His listening ear, and we spread a message of hope to all of our Heavenly Father's children.

Being a woman in these latter days is a great challenge, but if we focus our efforts on serving one another with love, we can lift one another, lighten each other’s burdens, and strengthen each other, so that it may truly be said of us like in Matthew, Chapter 25, verse 35:  "For I was an hungred, and ye gave me meat: I was thirsty, and ye gave me drink: I was a stranger, and ye took me in."   

It is my hope and prayer that we may all do more for each other, and lift one another.  In closing, I'd like to share a few words from the song, 'Scatter Sunshine':

"Slightest actions often meet the sorest needs,
For the world wants daily
Little kindly deeds."

………………………………….I say these things in the name of Jesus Christ, AMEN